I guess I’m one of those “need to be there, doing it” people to truly understand the massive wave of love, confusion, tiredness and emotion that is early day parenting. It’s all consuming. The learning curve is steep. There are not enough hours in the day. It is amazing yet exhausting, exhilarating and sometimes frustrating.
After an initial week and a half of cooing with cries reserved for the changing table, LLC “found her voice.” I should have known she’d have a strong one from the start if I’m any model to go by! Last Sunday night this new voice manifested itself in a wave of crying that would not abate. Maybe she missed her grandma and grandpa, who had returned to the USA the previous day. I think she was also beyond overtired and protesting sleep. Her tears brought on my own. We had been coping so well. For the first time in my life as a parent, I felt well and truly out of my depth because I just didn’t know how to help her.
Maybe this was a well needed reality check. On the whole she is such a sweet tempered baby, but all babies cry, it’s their voice. I need to learn how to understand her personality, cues, patterns and listening to her voice is perhaps the first step towards this. We haven't had another incident like we did Sunday, but she has been more vocal and I'm trying my best to read her and give her what she needs be it food, rest, comfort....
It's hard work but well worth it and I'm very in love. When she wraps her little fingers around mine and sqeezes my heart skips a beat.
Friday, 12 February 2010
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